


hit me baby one more time

by goldsteps



Category: Phandom/The Fantastic Foursome (YouTube RPF), Shrek (Movies), Super Mario & Related Fandoms
Genre: F/M, M/M, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-27
Updated: 2017-05-27
Packaged: 2018-11-05 15:44:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 552
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11016501
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldsteps/pseuds/goldsteps
Summary: i don't regret this





	hit me baby one more time

"denture glue," danma mumured under her breath, "where is the denture glue?"

it was a sunny saturday afternoon and danma decided to take a trip to target, since she had nothing better to do. she made herself a list (and checked it twice), making sure she included all the things she needed to buy while there. the list consisted of dish soap, honey, lube, and denture glue. she had been in the store for half an hour and found everything on her list except denture glue.

she decided it was time to man up and ask for help. there ought to be someone around here who knew where the denture glue was.

changing directions, she exited the aisle and entered another one, hoping to find a target employee. there wasn't one there though. what she saw in that aisle was far worse than anything she could've imagined.

there, in aisle 137, she saw her ex-lover shrek holding hands with someone she hoped to never see again - waluigi.

that homewrecking, slut-fuck, purple overall-wearing dusty ass bitch, she thought to herself as she laid her eyes on him.

just then, almost as if he had heard her thoughts, waluigi looked up, his eyes meeting her own. "WAAAH," he yelled, it almost coming out as a roar.

"what the fuck did you just say to me? how about you say that to my face," danma challenged as she took a step towards him.

"whoa, whoa, whoa," shrek said before stepping in between the two. "no need to get crazy, mates."

"i'll get crazy if i wanta," waluigi roared, glaring at the old woman. if it weren't for shrek, he would've lept forward and attacked danma. but he loved his boyfriend too much to put him in any kind of danger, so instead, he stayed put.

danma wasn't as worried though. she wanted to hurt waluigi, and she didn't care if shrek was injured in the process. so she did what any other grandma whose relationship was ruined by a homewrecking mario kart reject would do - she reached into her mouth and grabbed her dentures, throwing them in the tall man's direction.

the dentures hit waluigi right in the forehead, causing him to stumble back. shrek gasped at the impact. "aye, what is wrong with ya?!" shrek yelled. "you could've killed him!"

"good!"

danma's lips curved up and satisfied smile made its way onto her face as she watched waluigi try to regain his balance. soon enough, he did, and he looked back up. the expression on his face wasn't one of hurt or anger though, it was one of happiness.

"WAAAH," he let out before taking two steps forward. "hit me like that again, baby."

shrek and danma looked at each other in shock.

"wha-"

before danma could finish her sentence, waluigi cut her off. "i said hit me again, baby. i want to feel your wet dentures on my face."

the three of them exchanged looks. smirks spread across each of their faces, and suddenly it became undeniably hot in aisle 137.

danma picked up her dentures and put them back in her mouth, licking them and making sure they were wet enough for waluigi. "how hard do you want me to hit you, wally."

"as hard as you can, danma."

\- to be continued -


End file.
